What I see that most gets in the way of communication between an NT and a HFA is the NT’s cesspool of emotions. We have so much crap emotion happening in our bodies. Stuff that has been in there since we were 3 years old. Junk emotions. This creates hot buttons. So when your HFA embarrasses you, it’s actually YOUR problem. The action of your HFA has triggered an old emotion that resides in YOUR body. It was something that YOU did and then experienced someone telling you that you were stupid or maybe you were even rejected. In order to communicate with our HFAs, we have to clean out the cesspool.
I’m not just yelling at you. I had my own cesspool to clean out. OMG. I had become paranoid and would see things that weren’t there. I was making up stuff. Literally. I can with definitiveness say that I am no longer that person. Using the following techniques gave me a completely different personality and life is so much more alive and fun. Oh. And there’s the clear communication with Mark, my HFA, that wasn’t there before.
In Eastern traditions we are not just a physical body, we are 5 bodies, 4 of which we can’t see with our physical eyes. (Quantum physics is confirming this insight.) There is the physical, feeling, thought (lower mental), higher mental and bliss body. (So if we think of ourselves as 5 bodies we can see how we are connected to the Divine.) Because in our western culture we don’t believe in 5 bodies, we don’t realize that we can control them. We take in experiences and beliefs as a child and think that that is the way we are supposed to believe and experience for the rest of our lives. We don’t know that we have the capacity to choose differently. We don’t know that our beliefs aren’t serving us. We don’t even know that we can change them! Beliefs are just thoughts that are thought over and over and they are located in a combination of the feelings and thought bodies. This is where conditioning lives. This is where the cesspool lives. We need to examine every thought and belief we think we are. Healing begins in the feeling and thought bodies. ( As a side effect, your physical body will heal.)
What comes first, the thought or the emotion? When you have a cesspool, you think it’s the emotions, but since cleaning mine, I know it’s the thought. Get a hold of your thoughts and you can have the emotions you want/choose to have. This requires rebooting your mind and putting software in that YOU want to experience. No easy task, but it is simple. It involves affirmations. I wrote thousands of sentences of thoughts that I would prefer to have. It felt fake at first, but as I continued, I started believing what I was writing. Mark uses prayer beads. He has a row of 100 beads. He touches each bead and says the affirmation. For instance, if you constantly have the thought that you are unworthy, choose to say or write, “I am worthy and deserve happiness”. If you have “I’m stupid” running constantly in your mind, choose to think, “I’m wonderful and perfect”. Yeah. I hear your pfffts. I’m telling you, I had the same soundtrack running in my mind. It can be done.
This won’t work though if you don’t get the cesspool of feelings out of your body. I used two energy techniques that actually release emotions from the body. The Emotional Freedom Techniques, which I still use it to this day, is a technique that actually takes feelings attached to traumas out of the body forever. It took me out of the movie. I became an observer of my past rather than an actor. This was and still is a miracle to me. Check it out here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0I54BRKQ2po&feature=related and learn how to do it here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQp0kA5a5OI. Another feeling body healing technique is Psych-K. It seemed to work on a broader range of emotions than EFT and I felt better faster, but you need a partner for this. Learn about it here. http://psych-k.com/ There are practitioners of EFT and Psych-K in most states.
I cannot emphasize enough how important getting out of the muck of the cesspool is to better communication with all of humanity. If you would like help getting out of your cesspool, we are here for you.